Leadership Locker · Session 02Daniel K. Bernard© 2026
Leadership Locker · Session 02

Next-Level Trust

Trust is the thing that makes all other things possible.

2
Definitions

Basic trust predicts behavior. Next-level trust drops the guard.

3
Strengths

Real strengths of a team, each with a dark side when next-level trust is missing.

~45min
To work through

Read, answer the prompts, take it into your week. Your notes stay on this device.

Before you begin

Have we built next-level trust?

Trust is the thing that makes all other things possible. We understand this in the context of teams and church work, but sometimes trust is such an overused word with varying definitions that it loses its meaning. So I want to give two definitions. The first I would consider basic trust. The second, the one I want to focus on, I am going to call next-level trust.

Basic trust

"The ability to predict a person's behavior based on past experiences."

Earned over time. Most teams that have worked together for years have plenty of this.

Next-level trust

"Confidence among team members that their peers' intentions are good, and there is no reason to be protective or careful around the group."

You were with me until that last part, right? Easy to read, tough to live out.

Definitions drawn from The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni.

Let me be clear

I know that our team has a very high level of trust. You have worked together for years, you have been friends for years. You have seen each other through life's ups and downs. That is not what is in question. The question is, have we built next-level trust? I think our team coming together and working to build this kind of trust will pay dividends in every aspect of our work together.

How to use this

Four parts: the pyramid, the strengths and their dark sides, the phone test, and separating yourself from your ideas. Read a part and answer the prompts before moving on, then take the checklist at the end into your week. Everything you type stays on this device only, so be honest.

0 of 4 parts
Part one

Absence of trust is the bottom of the pyramid.

Patrick Lencioni, in his book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, likens the five dysfunctions of a team to a pyramid. I want to talk about what the impact of the first level will be on our team if we are not intentional and careful, because everything above it is built on it.

Hand-drawn pyramid of the five dysfunctions of a team: absence of trust at the base, then fear of conflict, lack of commitment, avoidance of accountability, and inattention to results at the top.
From my notes. The five dysfunctions, bottom to top, drawn from The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni.

What next-level trust produces

Here are the end results of next-level trust in a team. Read them as a ladder, because each one depends on the one before it.

  1. They trust one another.
  2. They engage in unfiltered conflict around ideas.Hard
  3. They commit to decisions and plans of action.
  4. They hold one another accountable for delivering against those plans.Hard
  5. They focus on the achievement of collective results.

Specifically, points two and four are very difficult, and they require an extremely high level of trust to achieve. You cannot argue well with someone you are being careful around, and you cannot hold someone accountable if you are worried about how they will take it.

Proverbs 11:14
"Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety."

Reflect

1 Of the five results, which one does our team do naturally, and which one do we avoid?

2 When was the last time you disagreed out loud in a meeting? If it has been a while, what stopped you?

Notes save on this device only.

Part two

Our strengths and their dark side.

I want to highlight some strengths of our team that I have observed, that I believe are what allow us to do as much as we do. These are strengths I see in every aspect of leadership and volunteering, and they are wonderful. But without next-level trust, there is also a dark side to these strengths.

Hand-drawn chart. Strength: willingness to do whatever it takes to get things done, arrow to dark side: overcommitment. Deep sense of personal responsibility, arrow to fear of failure. Willingness to do things you don't have to do, are not your job, and you won't get credit for, arrow to overstepping.
From my notes. Every strength on the left has an arrow.
2.1

Strength one: whatever it takes

Willingness to do whatever it takes to get things done, combined with a deep sense of personal responsibility to the vision or the task at hand. This is such an incredible strength of our church. I see people volunteering their time, energy, and talents, which is humbling to me. I cannot stress enough how incredible and uncommon this is. You all do so much and are willing to do whatever it takes for the kingdom of God.

2.2

Dark side: overcommitment

If we do not have next-level trust in each other, you will overcommit your time but then feel like you cannot speak up or ask for help, because you are worried about the repercussions from the group, or how it will make you look, or how people will perceive you. If you do not have next-level trust with everyone, you will not feel comfortable speaking up when you have overcommitted.

2.3

Dark side: fear of failure

Additionally, the dark side of deep personal responsibility without next-level trust is a deep fear of personal failure. The same thing that makes you own the task makes a mistake feel like the end of the world, unless you know for certain the people around you will not use it against you.

2.4

Strength two: not my job

Willingness to do things you do not have to do, are not your job, and you do not get credit for. This is a vital strength for our church. With so many moving parts and so many people speaking into and having influence over aspects of our services and operations, we have to be able to jump in and assist, fix problems we see, and cover for each other. It is amazing when someone can have the trust in someone else to have their back without that fear of their vulnerabilities being used against them.

2.5

Dark side: overstepping

Without next-level trust, the danger is that other people will not trust your intentions, or not know your intentions, or not feel the liberty to tell you when they feel like you have overstepped. The danger of an "I see a problem and I will fix it, even if it is not my job" mindset is that the leader on the receiving end of that solved problem may not interpret it as a solved problem, but as an overstep or an overreach on your part.

Next-level trust is

Trust that our vulnerabilities will not be used against us. Vulnerabilities include weaknesses, skill deficiencies, interpersonal shortcomings, and mistakes.

Next-level trust is

"By building trust, a team makes conflict possible because team members do not hesitate to engage in passionate and sometimes emotional debate, knowing that they will not be punished for saying something that might otherwise be interpreted as destructive or critical."

Handwritten note: this is so tough
Galatians 6:2
"Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ."
James 5:16
"Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed."

Try this

Say the overcommitment out loud.

Find the one thing on your plate this week that you said yes to and should not have. Tell the person it affects, and ask for help before it becomes a fire. Notice what it costs you to say it, and what it does not.

Reflect

1 Which of the three strengths is most you? Be honest about which arrow you have followed to the dark side.

2 Is there something you have overcommitted to right now that nobody knows about? Who would you have to trust to say it?

3 When you fixed a problem that was not yours, did the person who owned it hear help, or overreach?

Notes save on this device only.

Part three

The phone test. My name pops up on your phone.

Next-level trust pop quiz. My name pops up on your phone. What is your gut reaction?

We have all been in that position with someone, either in leadership or just in our life. Their name appears on our phone and our stomach drops and our mind begins to race. What did I do? Why are they calling? What is wrong?

That is one of the worst feelings in the world, and one that I never want anyone on our team to feel. But if you are going to feel differently when I call, it is because we have built next-level trust.

And if your team is going to feel differently when you call them, it is going to be because you have taken the time to build next-level trust in them.

If your team is going to feel differently when you call, it is because you took the time to build next-level trust in them.Pastor Bernard
A phone screen showing an incoming contact card for Daniel Bernard, Senior Pastor, First Church Sterling Heights.
What happens in your stomach right here?

Try this

Make a call that is not about a problem.

This week, call or text two people you lead with nothing to fix and nothing to ask for. Encouragement only. You are changing what your name means when it shows up on their screen.

Reflect

1 Whose name makes your stomach drop? What would it take for that to change, and is any of it yours to do?

2 What do you think the people you lead feel when your name shows up? What would they say if you asked them?

Notes save on this device only.

Part four

I am not my ideas.

This is a difficult but important thing to consider if we desire to get to a place where we can have unfiltered conversations around important topics. We have to separate ourselves from our ideas, otherwise we will take any critical feedback about our idea as a personal attack. And if we do that, two things happen. Everyone will notice, and nobody will be comfortable giving feedback in the future.

4.1

Accountability, reframed

Accountability is "the willingness of team members to call someone out on performance or behaviors that might hurt the team." That definition might seem negative at first glance. But instead of looking at the phrase "call someone out" from the perspective of negative feedback, look at it from the perspective of being vulnerable enough to trust someone with potentially hurtful feedback. Wouldn't you want someone to tell you if you were doing something that would negatively impact the team or a project, but you did not see it? Of course you would. But having the trust to actually do that is another thing. That is why we need next-level trust.

4.2

Be vulnerable about your connection to an idea

The first way to separate yourself from an idea is to say out loud how attached you are to it. It is my responsibility to give a little context to my idea, which helps inform people on how to interact with it. In either case, I hope I have enough next-level trust to allow the idea to be critiqued, because I am not my ideas. Still, with more context, other people are better equipped to interact with the idea and know what types of comments may be taken personally.

Example: the idea of three services

Scenario A

"I just thought about this."

For the sake of conversation, I toss out some potential times for us all to consider, hash out, discuss, and shred to pieces.

Scenario B

"Here's the plan I've been thinking about."

I have been speaking to my father about what he thinks is best, I have spent hours formulating it, and I feel really confident this is the best course of action.

If you were in a meeting with me to discuss this idea, wouldn't you respond differently to scenario A than to scenario B? Of course you would. Same idea, different weight. The context is what tells the room how to handle it.

4.3

Follow up when it goes beyond the idea to you

If someone hurts your feelings, or crosses the line from critiquing your ideas to critiquing you, you must let them know. Think about it from the perspective of intent versus impact. If we have next-level trust with one another, we will assume that if the impact of what someone said hurt us, that was not their intent, because they would not hurt us on purpose. And then we go and say so, privately, so it can be repaired.

Next-level trust is

Not immediately judging people by the impact of their statements, but taking a step back and thinking about their intent. We judge our own comments by our intentions. If we are not careful, we will judge other people's comments by their impact and never consider what their intentions could have been.

Ephesians 4:15
"But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ."
Proverbs 28:23
"He that rebuketh a man afterwards shall find more favour than he that flattereth with the tongue."

Try this

Label your next idea.

The next time you bring an idea to the team, open with one sentence about how attached you are to it. "I just thought of this," or "I have been working on this for weeks." Then invite the room to take it apart.

Reflect

1 Think of the last idea you brought that got pushback. Did you hear it as feedback on the idea, or on you?

2 Is there a comment from a teammate you are still carrying? Have you judged it by its impact or by their intent? What would it take to go and ask?

Notes save on this device only.

Take it with you

This week, in the rooms you lead.

Next-level trust is not easy, and it takes time. Building it with people you are already close to can be even harder, because you do not want to risk the friendship and closeness you already have. But I believe that with the help of the Lord, we can continue to build on the deep trust our leadership team already shares and do even more things for the glory of God. Check these off as you do them.

Group discussion

1 Where does our team have basic trust but not yet next-level trust? How can you tell?

2 Which of the three dark sides shows up most in our culture: overcommitment, fear of failure, or overstepping?

3 When did an idea get shredded in a meeting and the room got better for it? When did it get shredded and someone went quiet?

4 What would have to be true for everyone here to feel nothing but good when a teammate's name shows up on their phone?

My one sentence

Finish this: The place I am still being careful around this team is ____, and this week I will ____.

Notes save on this device only.

Handwritten quote: If you don't like change, you're going to like irrelevance even less. General Eric Shinseki, former U.S. Army Chief of Staff.
From my notes. Building this kind of trust is a change, and change is the cheaper option.
Closing word · 1 John 4:18
"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love."
Handwritten: Thank you for taking the time to read this. I appreciate you and all you do for our church. Signed, Daniel Bernard.